Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

Some people think I am going crazy. The joke is on them. I went there years ago, fell in love with the place and decided to stay.

I recently took a pole. 99% of people were annoyed when their tents fell down.

I would love to get paid to sleep...It would be a dream job.

Whatever you're doing, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood.

Did you hear the latest scandal? Pythagoras was caught in a love triangle

life, n.: A whim of several billion cells to be you for a while