Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

Never confuse education with intelligence, you can have a PhD and still be an idiot.

I don't know the secret to happiness, but I tell you what, I have never been sad at a Mexican restaurant.

I can totally keep secrets. It's the people I tell them to who can't.

I'd tell you to go to hell but I work there and don't want to see you every day.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Never interrupt your opponent while he's making a mistake.