Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
Saying 'let me check my schedule' when you know full well you have nothing going on.
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Couch potatoes should occasionally check under their cushions. You never know what might turnip!
I don't know what's tighter, my jeans or my schedule.
I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make 1 wool sweater. I didn't even know they knew how to knit.
Sarcasm helps keep people from understanding you're saying what you really think of them.
It's very hard to concentrate when I'm in a room full of cookies!
You come from dust and return to dust. That's why I don't dust. It could be someone I know.
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