Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

After a short conversation, someone asked me if I was a nerd.
I said I preferred the term "smarter than you".

Kidnapping? I prefer the term "surprise adoption."

Do not let your mind wander too much. It is too small for you to let it out alone.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

It's sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs.

"Lazy" is such a strong word. I prefer to call it 'selective participation.'