Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
You can't be late until you show up.
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Currently helping my son look for his chocolate that I ate last night.
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I used to like my neighbors, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi.
Whenever I try to eat healthy, a chocolate bar looks at me and snickers.
Studies show that 99% of Dans are not "the man."
Only 273 fruit roll-ups to go until I get my full serving of fruit...
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