Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
Studies show that 99% of Dans are not "the man."
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Studies have shown that people will believe in anything that starts with the words "Studies have shown".
You can't be late until you show up.
After 20 minutes of being ignored, it's amazing how fast Home Depot employees show up when you try to start a chainsaw.
I was going to put on a sock-puppet show, but I got cold feet.
If there is no pool, I am not showing up.
I need a raise just for showing up.
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