Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

I went to get acupuncture the other day, and when I got home my voodoo doll was dead.

The chicken went to the gym to work on his pecks.

Some people think I am going crazy. The joke is on them. I went there years ago, fell in love with the place and decided to stay.

I went bald early in life but I still kept a comb. I just can't part with it.

Wi-Fi went down for five minutes, so I had to talk to my family. They seem nice.

When I was little I went to a child psychologist. That kid did nothing for me.