Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

I never use a napkin on my lap at a restaurant because I believe in myself.

I'm on a seafood diet. If I see food, I eat it.

Pepsi and Coke can't even be in the same restaurant together and society wants us all to get along?

Never fight with French people. They eat pain for breakfast!

I finally figured out why vegans are healthier. They have to walk at least twice as far to find a vegan friendly restaurant!

Went to a seafood disco. Pulled a mussel.