Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

Whiteboards are remarkable.

I have always been suspicious of Wendy's hamburgers because they are square; much unlike the round hamburgers one finds in nature.

The nice thing about meditation is that it makes doing nothing quite respectable.

To the person who stole my glasses - I will find you, I have contacts.

When I find it, I don't need it. When I need it, I can't find it.

I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift, but I couldn't find a manual.