Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

It's shocking how much unhappiness is caused by the pressure to be happy.

I really want to work so hard. But being lazy is much more fun.

Running is the best way to remind yourself how much you love sitting.

I really want to start a new diet, but I've got too much on my plate right now.

What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

I know I don't have to be sarcastic, but the world has given me so much material to work with. I would hate to be wasteful.