Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

I have a condition that makes me eat when I can't sleep. It's called Insom-nom-nom-nom-nia.

It might be called social media, but all I do is share photos and ignore people.

Apple and Blackberry should team up to make a phone called The Pie.

A large group of Karens is called a Homeowners Association.

It is only called a gambling problem if you are losing.

Starting a page called Older Fans, where I tell everyone what hurts today and what small task I was doing that caused the pain.