Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

I told my suitcase we're not going on vacation this year. Now I'm dealing with emotional baggage.

I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me vacation ads.

For years there's been talk about getting rid of the US penny and they finally did it! Some people are just afraid of change.

I need a six month vacation, twice a year.

If we're not supposed to eat at night, then why is there a light in the fridge?

Why did they call it "the dark ages"? Because there were so many knights.