Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

It is only called a gambling problem if you are losing.

I saw a group of chickens walking in unison. It was poultry in motion...

Vaping is weird. You walk past a group of guys looking like gangsters but smell like strawberry muffins.

Starting a page called Older Fans, where I tell everyone what hurts today and what small task I was doing that caused the pain.

Why aren't roadies called band aides?

Sometimes I go hours without drinking coffee. It's called sleeping.