Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

War doesn't determine who's right—it determines who's left.

Maybe the day doesn't like being seized.

If it doesn't make sense I just smile and nod.

I hate when homeless people shake their cup of coins at me. It's like yeah, I know you have more money than me — no need to rub it in.

Cops just left. They said if I am going to walk around my house naked, I am going have to do it inside.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but your waiter doesn't really think your choice was excellent.