Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
She left a note on the fridge saying "This isn't working, goodbye". I opened it and it works just fine.
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My Monday motivation left a note. It said 'good luck' and disappeared.
I'm mature, but not mature-mature. For example I still use "righty tighty, lefty loosey" to figure shit out.
I'm afraid if I start working out, I'll be too sexy.
When I was fired from my job as a stage designer, I just left without making a scene.
To understand paranoid people better, follow them around. Observe them. Write down notes.
I'm now at the age where if I see a nice nursing home, I make a mental note of it.
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