Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
My heels are higher than your standards.
If you’re going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty.
You look like something I drew with my left hand.
Sassy, classy, and a bit bad-assy.
Treat me like a joke and I'll leave you like it's funny.
I may be wrong, but I highly doubt it.
Cancel my subscription to your issues.
I'm not short, I'm built for speed and comfort.
Nap time sounds like a juvenile thing, but as an adult, it sounds like a high-end luxury prize.
One day I am going to make the onions cry.