Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
I wonder how many animals we tried to ride before we discovered horses we cool with it.
I wonder if Harvard is angry it doesn't have a comma named after it?
Is it just me or when you turn off the computer by holding down the power button, it feels like Iām choking it to death.
Marry someone who can cook. Love fades, hunger doesn't.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I buy bananas is to watch them die a painful death on my counter.
King Arthur's lesser known but saucy knight, Sir Acha
Since there is only one of me, does that make me endangered or limited edition?
Studies show that 99% of Dans are not "the man."
If something's not going right, try left.
Today is the first day of the rest of your life, and if that doesn't work out, tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.