Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
It's amazing that baby birds just teach themselves how to fly. Is it hard-wired at birth or do they wing it?
What's a world cup player's least favorite sweater? A red cardigan.
My screen time report came in and honestly I'm not ready for that conversation.
My patience is like my data plan. Running dangerously low.
Posting this from the couch, where I have been for 6 hours, on purpose.
Zombies eat brains. Don't worry, you're safe.
I'm not antisocial. I'm selectively social. There's a difference.
I wish I could mute people in real life.
My life feels like a test I didn't study for.
My brain: Go to sleep. Also my brain: Remember that thing from 8 years ago? Let's think about it for 3 hours.