Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
My house looks like I'm losing a game of Jumanji.
Is Marx's tomb a communist plot?
I pulled a wooden shoe out of my toilet last night. Not too bad, it was a small clog.
Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
I had cheese, but no crackers. I was cracka-lackin.
I lost my mood ring. I am unsure how I feel about it.
Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
Being married is solving problems together. Problems I wouldn't have if I was single.
Whiteboards are remarkable.
Today everyone wants instant gratification, no matter how long it takes.